I Failed The Mirror Test At 7:47 AM (And Discovered The 3 Identity Masks Destroying High Achievers)

Hi there, my friend,

Last Tuesday morning, I caught myself doing something embarrassing.

I was brushing my teeth, staring at my reflection, and for a split second, I didn't recognize the person looking back at me.

Not physically. But the eyes. They looked... tired. Disconnected.

That's when it hit me: I was failing the mirror test.

Let me share what I've discovered about the masks we wear each day - and how to escape these mental constructs that are holding us back each day.

Let’s dive in.

The Mirror Test That Changes Everything

Here's something most high achievers never talk about: We become so good at playing our roles that we forget who we actually are underneath.

You know the feeling. You're crushing it at work, checking all the boxes, hitting every target. But when you're alone with your thoughts, there's this nagging question:

"Is this really me?"

The mirror test is simple: When you look at yourself - really look - do you see someone living their truth, or someone performing their life?

The Three Masks We Wear

After breaking free from golden handcuffs, I've noticed we all wear the same three masks:

Mask #1: The Achiever
"I am what I accomplish." Your worth is tied to your next promotion, your latest deal, your quarterly numbers. Remove the achievements, and you're not sure who's left.

Mask #2: The Provider
"I am what I give others." Your identity revolves around being needed - by your company, your family, your team. But what happens when they don't need you anymore?

Mask #3: The Professional
"I am my title." You introduce yourself by what you do, not who you are. Your business card has become your identity card.

Here's the brutal truth: These masks aren't protecting you - they're suffocating you.

The Identity Prison

I learned this the hard way during my corporate days in Singapore. I was so busy being the "reliable finance PM" that I forgot I was also the person who used to write stories, who dreamed of building something meaningful, who actually had opinions beyond quarterly forecasts.

The scariest part? I was good at being someone else. Really good. So good that I almost convinced myself it was the real me.

But your soul knows the difference. It shows up as:

• Sunday night anxiety

• Feeling empty after big wins

• Envying people who seem "authentic"

• Wondering "Is this all there is?"

The Path Back to Yourself

The journey back to your authentic self isn't about dramatic life changes. It's about small, daily choices to honor who you really are.

Start with these three practices:

1. The Morning Question
Before checking your phone, ask: "What does my authentic self want to create today?" Not your boss, not your family, not society. You.

2. The Energy Audit
Track what activities make you feel alive versus what drains you. Your authentic self is hiding in those moments of natural energy.

3. The Childhood Compass
What fascinated you before the world told you what to care about? Those early interests are breadcrumbs leading back to your true self.

The Permission You've Been Waiting For

Here's what I wish someone had told me years ago: You don't need permission to be yourself.

You don't need to wait for the right time, the perfect plan, or other people's approval. You just need to start honoring the person you see in quiet moments - the one who has dreams beyond your current reality.

The world doesn't need another perfect professional. It needs you - messy, authentic, fully expressed you.

Your AI Identity Architect

I've crafted a custom prompt that transforms ChatGPT into your Identity Coach. This will help you map your current identity versus your emerging one, creating a clear path for authentic living.

Here's how to access it:

1. Visit ChatGPT (https://chat.openai.com/)

2. Copy and paste the following prompt

3. Fill in your specific background information

4. Watch as AI helps you navigate your identity

Your role is to act as an Identity Evolution Coach, specialized in helping high-achieving professionals align their actions with their emerging identity.

Here's my situation:

[Describe your current role, what you're known for, what feels authentic vs. what feels like performance, and who you sense you're becoming]

Areas for Analysis:

Current identity: Evaluate current behaviors, habits, and roles
Desired identity: Define your vision of who you are becoming
Barriers: Identify what's keeping you stuck in old patterns
Resources: Determine where your time and energy currently go
Inspiration: Recognize activities that light you up but are rarely pursued

Your Task:

Provide actionable insights on the following:

Perform a gap analysis between current and desired identities
Describe two environmental changes that will support your evolution
Propose a daily practice to strengthen your emerging identity
Develop a strategy for navigating peer pressure and expectations
Identify warning signs that indicate slipping back into old patterns
Ensure your advice is direct, practical, and focuses on gradual transition while prioritizing authenticity over external validation.

HOW TO USE THE PROMPT

Here is the output I received for the example inputs above.

Read the full output here!

The Final Mirror

As I finish writing this, I'm looking at my reflection again. This time, I see someone who chose authenticity over approval, truth over comfort, growth over safety.

The person looking back isn't perfect. But real.

And that makes all the difference.

Your authentic self is waiting. They've been patient, but they won't wait forever.

What will you see when you look in the mirror tomorrow?

To your authentic success,
Stephan

P.S. The best time to start being yourself was years ago. The second best time? Right now. Your future self is counting on the choice you make today.