What My 'Exceeds Expectations' Review Taught Me About Freedom

Hey there, my friend!

Last week, I found an old performance review.

"Exceeds expectations," it said. I had to laugh.

Whose expectations was I exceeding? Certainly not my own.

That hit me hard.

It represented years of playing by rules I never chose, chasing goals that weren't mine, seeking validation from people whose opinions shouldn't matter.

What I'm about to share isn't just another story. It's a wake-up call - and a way out.

Let’s dive in.

The Origins of Our Prison

We're all running programs we never consciously installed. Think about it:

• Age 6: "Ask permission to speak"

• Age 10: "Follow the curriculum"

• Age 18: "Choose a sensible degree"

• Age 22: "Climb the corporate ladder"

• Age 30: "You're too old to change paths"

Each step, another link in our golden handcuffs. Each promotion, another brick in our comfortable prison.

It's not just about being friendly—it's about understanding the deep-seated psychological drives that influence behavior.

The Hidden Cost of Following the Script

Let me share something that shook me: According to a 2023 Gallup study, 85% of people worldwide feel disconnected from their work.

Think about that. In a room of 100 "successful" professionals, 85 are secretly wondering if they've made a terrible mistake.

I was one of them. Here's what my "success" really looked like:

• 50+ hour work weeks in a gleaming Singapore office

• Endless meetings about meetings

• Sunday night anxiety that started creeping in on Saturday morning

The real cost? It wasn't just time or energy.

It was something far more precious: possibility.

The Three Permission Paradoxes

I've identified three core paradoxes that keep us trapped:

1. The Achievement Paradox

• The more we achieve, the harder it becomes to change

• Higher stakes mean bigger golden handcuffs

• Success becomes a cage built from our own accomplishments

My last promotion came with a 40% raise. It also came with an invisible chain - the "you'd be crazy to leave this" chain. Sound familiar?

2. The Security Paradox

• We chase security through stability

• Yet the most stable companies of yesterday are today's cautionary tales

• Nokia. Kodak. Blockbuster. All killed by their own certainty

Here's what hit me hard: The average lifespan of an S&P 500 company has dropped from 60 years to less than 20. We're trading our dreams for security that doesn't even exist.

3. The Identity Paradox

• We become our job titles

• Our business cards become our identity

• Our salary becomes our self-worth

But is that really true?

The Breaking Point: When Success Feels Like Failure

Here's a moment I'll never forget: December 2018, company holiday party. I am accepting a team award for outstanding performance, fake smile plastered on my face, and all I can think is, "Nobody here knows how meaningless this feels".

The stats hit close to home:

• 76% of high-achievers report feeling trapped in their success

• 68% of executives admit to staying in jobs they hate due to golden handcuffs

• 91% of people who delay career changes cite financial fear as the primary reason

But here's what's fascinating - and terrifying:

Bronnie Ware, a palliative care nurse, spent years recording the top regrets of the dying. Know what topped the list?

"I wish I'd had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me."

Not money. Not status. Not bigger houses or fancier cars.

Just authenticity.

The Warning Signs You're Living Someone Else's Life

Physical Signals:

• Chronic Sunday night insomnia

• Unexplained headaches or digestive issues

• Energy crashes that no amount of coffee can fix

• That tight chest feeling during Monday morning meetings

Mental Patterns:

• Constantly calculating years until retirement

• Fantasizing about quitting during meetings

• Feeling jealous when others quit their jobs

• Starting sentences with "Someday I'll..."

I experienced every single one. But here's what I learned: These aren't signs of weakness. They're your inner voice screaming for attention.

The Permission Protocol: Breaking Free

Let me share my actual journey - not a polished highlight reel, but the real steps I took to break free.

The Preparation Phase

While still in my corporate role, I started noticing the writing on the wall. AI wasn't just coming - it was already reshaping industries. I knew I had to act, but not recklessly.

Here's what I did first:

Financial Foundation

• Calculated one year of essential living expenses

• Systematically built my safety net while employed

• Reduced fixed costs without compromising life quality

• Created a bare-minimum monthly budget

The key? I didn't sacrifice health for savings.

Here's why:

• Maintained quality nutrition (your brain needs fuel for big changes)

• Established a consistent workout routine

• Practiced yoga and meditation for mental clarity

• Protected my sleep schedule despite work pressure

This wasn't just about health - it was about building the mental strength for what came next.

The Knowledge Sprint

Instead of mindless Netflix after work, I:

• Studied AI developments and future trends

• Read extensively about psychology and business

• Connected with others building online businesses

• Experimented with no-code AI tools

Real talk: Most of my early experiments failed.

I tried:

• Building AI influencers

• Creating a financial education platform

• Developing no-code chatbots

But each "failure" taught me something crucial about the market, technology, and myself.

The Permission Slip

Here's what I want you to know: You don't need anyone's permission to reimagine your life.

The future of work is changing rapidly, and the biggest risk isn't taking a chance - it's staying still.

Your Next Steps

1. Start today:

• Calculate your monthly minimum expenses

• Dedicate 1 hour daily to learning

• Connect with others on this path

2. Begin experimenting:

• Test small business ideas

• Learn one new tool or skill

• Build while your job pays the bills

Your current job title isn't your identity. It's just your current chapter.

The next chapter? That's yours to write.

Harnessing AI: Your Transition Co-Pilot

Ready to accelerate your journey to freedom? I've engineered a custom prompt that transforms ChatGPT into your personal Career Transition Strategist. This AI tool will help you create a practical escape plan tailored to your unique situation.

Here's your launchpad:

1. Visit ChatGPT (https://chat.openai.com/)

2. Copy and paste the following prompt

3. Fill in the [bracketed sections] with honest details

4. Let AI help map your transition strategy

You are a Career Transition Strategist specializing in helping corporate professionals build their path to freedom. Your expertise combines practical financial planning, skill assessment, and business development. You provide actionable, step-by-step guidance for people ready to transition from corporate life to entrepreneurship.

Here's my situation:

[Describe your current role, skills, savings, fixed expenses, and what type of business/freedom you want to build]

Please provide:

1. A practical assessment of my current position and readiness for transition
2. Two immediate actions to start my preparation while employed
3. A 6-month preparation blueprint customized to my situation
4. Specific strategies to build skills and test business ideas while employed
5. A financial preparation checklist for a safe transition
6. Three warning signs that would indicate I'm moving too fast or too slow

Your advice should be practical, risk-aware, and based on realistic transition timelines. Use a direct, pragmatic tone, as if you're an experienced mentor who has helped others make this journey successfully.

HOW TO USE THE PROMPT

Here is the output I received for the example inputs above.

Read the full output here!

As I sit here in my home office, that old performance review still in my head, I'm reminded of something powerful: Every major transformation in history started with a single decision.

The fish that first ventured onto land.

The Wright brothers who dared to fly.

The first person who quit their job to build something meaningful.

They all started with one choice.

Your future self is watching.

They know something you might not fully grasp yet: You're stronger than you think, more capable than you know, and absolutely ready to begin.

Whether you use the AI prompt above, start calculating your runway today, or simply admit to yourself that it's time for change - take that first step.

Because here's the truth I've learned:

The perfect moment never arrives. The perfect plan doesn't exist. The only thing that matters is starting.

Catch you on the other side of bold,

Stephan